I cannot count the times in the last year that someone has told me they are moving. It’s pretty common at certain life stages. Most people hate it. Everyone hates too much change at once- and moving is certainly that!.
The truth is that I lived in the same house for a long time, snug as a bug that had accumulated alot of stuff.
I had forgotten the amount of disruption that occurs with all the minute details of moving – not to mention the stress.
Moving is, according to the Google oracle, one of the top five most intense stressors in our lives. It’s right up there with death, divorce, marriage, etc.
One of the things that helped me make it through without completely losing my mind is all the big and little acts of kindness, generosity and encouragement from friends, family and strangers.
I am embarrassed to say that in the past, I have taken the act of others moving for granted.
I never got around to making a call to see how someone was doing during the move time, never offered to help – or if I did – said something like: “Let me know if I can do anything.”
That is a statement that is so completely general that it means almost nothing. Nice offer but better when it is more concrete.
Better questions are more specific and give you clues as to how you can best offer
· What do you need right now?
· How can I support you?
· What is your favorite dinner?
· What is your move date?
· What is your new address?
· What resources do you still need?
Here are some ideas developed by my carefully honed hindsight:
Ask What They Need
Asking what someone needs helps them clarify exactly what they do need and gives you some choices of what you might offer. It also gives them permission to receive help – as bootstrapping Americans, we are somewhat terrible in being able to ask for help. Once offered, however, it is gratefully received.
Ask How They Would They Would Feel Supported
Somehow, we feel like we are weak when we need support. The truth is that we all need support at various times and worried that if we ask, we will be imposing on others. The reality that we never consider is that giving others an opportunity to help is a gift in itself. It makes the world go around in a more loving way.
What’s Your Favorite Dinner?
Making or picking up dinner with a quick drop-off is always a great gift. If you want to make it special, include some wine or beer and some flowers.
Ask What is Hard Right Now
The answers to this question might give you some clues for what you might be able to do.
My son’s father in law noticed that I had boxes that I couldn’t lift that had to go back to storage. He called one night and told me that he knew I needed help and offered his lifting and logistical skills to help me clear it out.
I was so grateful – I never would have thought of asking him, but we got the job done in record time and had some laughs along the way.
Ask the date Duringof the move
There are many responses to this. The easiest is to make a call the night before and ask some of the questions above. You can also just tell them you are thinking about them and will circle back once they are moved.
Get Their New Address
Send a series of cards encouraging and inspiring them to let them know others care about them.
What Resources Do You Need?
During Covid, many things are closed and much creativity is in order. Share your sources of places to donate, people who need household items, recyclers who take things when the township doesn’t, people who can shred paper.
As you start to clear the decks, you will need resources for a multitude of things you never thought you would need. Helping others with your own good list is a huge help.
Think of the things you take for granted and what you could offer in the way of support.
Remember that others sometimes need to be asked to accept your help and will be so grateful for it when you do.
A note for the future.
We are changing the name of The Encouragement Project to Share Your Courage.
I’ll be writing more about these changes but look for them next week in the blog and on the website.
What I have learned through this move is that encouragement comes in packages of all sizes.
The size doesn’t really matter, it is the caring and the love shared that has kept me going.
I have made a note to ask the important questions whenever I hear of someone who is in a big transition so that it can make their experience just a bit better and help them stay connected.
I cannot count the times in the last year that someone has told me they are moving. It’s pretty common at certain life stages. Everyone hates too much change at once.
The truth is that I lived in the same house for a long time, snug as a bug.
I had forgotten the amount of disruption that occurs with all the minute details of living that once commonplace- not to mention the stress.
Moving is, according to the Google oracle, one of the top five most intense stressors in our lives. It’s right up there with death, divorce, marriage, etc.
One of the things that has helped me make it through without completely losing my mind is all the big and little acts of kindness, generosity and encouragement from friends, family and strangers.
I am embarrassed to say that in the past, I have taken the act of others moving for granted.
I never got around to making a call to see how someone was doing during the move time, never offered to help – or if I did – said something like: “Let me know if I can do anything.”
That is a statement that is so completely general that it means almost nothing. Nice offer but better when it is more concrete.
Better questions are more specific and give you clues as to what you can best offer. Here are a few:
· What do you need right now?
· How can I support you?
· What is your favorite dinner?
· What is your move date?
· What is your new address? Send a card of encouragement and inspiration.
· What resources do you still need?
Asking what someone needs helps them clarify exactly what they do need and gives you some choices of what you might offer. It also gives them permission to receive help – as bootstrapping Americans, we are somewhat terrible in being able to ask for help. Once offered, however, it is gratefully received.
Ask How They Would They Would Feel Supported
Somehow, we feel like we are weak when we need support. The truth is that we all need support at various times and worried that if we ask, we will be imposing on others. The reality that we never consider is that giving others an opportunity to help is a gift in itself. It makes the world go around in a more loving way.
What’s Your Favorite Dinner?
Making or picking up dinner with a quick drop-off is always a great gift. If you want to make it special, include some wine or beer and some flowers.
Ask What is Hard Right Now
The answers to this question might give you some clues for what you might be able to do.
My son’s father in law noticed that I had boxes that I couldn’t lift that had to go back to storage. He called one night and told me that he knew I needed help and offered his lifting and logistical skills to help me clear it out.
I was so grateful – I never would have thought of asking him, but we got the job done in record time and had some laughs along the way.
Ask When the Move Date Is
There are many responses to this. The easiest is to make a call the night before and ask some of the questions above. You can also just tell them you are thinking about them and will circle back once they are moved.
Get Their New Address
Send a series of cards encouraging and inspiring them to let them know others care about them.
What Resources Do You Need?
As they start to clear the decks, you will need resources for a multitude of things you never thought you would need. Helping others with your own good list is a huge help.
They will need: Places to donate things they aren’t taking, people who can benefit from gently used items and equipment, lists of handymen, garden cleanup, carpet cleaning, etc. – These resources are like gold when you can give reliable, trusted resources.
What I have learned through this move is that encouragement comes in packages of all sizes.
The size doesn’t really matter, it is the caring and the love shared that has kept me going.
I have made a note to ask the important questions whenever I hear of someone who is in a big transition so that it can make their experience just a bit better and help them stay connected.
I cannot count the times in the last year that someone has told me they are moving. It’s pretty common at certain life stages. Everyone hates too much change at once.
The truth is that I lived in the same house for a long time, snug as a bug.
I had forgotten the amount of disruption that occurs with all the minute details of living that once commonplace- not to mention the stress.
Moving is, according to the Google oracle, one of the top five most intense stressors in our lives. It’s right up there with death, divorce, marriage, etc.
One of the things that has helped me make it through without completely losing my mind is all the big and little acts of kindness, generosity and encouragement from friends, family and strangers.
I am embarrassed to say that in the past, I have taken the act of others moving for granted.
I never got around to making a call to see how someone was doing during the move time, never offered to help – or if I did – said something like: “Let me know if I can do anything.”
That is a statement that is so completely general that it means almost nothing. Nice offer but better when it is more concrete.
Better questions are more specific and give you clues as to how you can best offer
· What do you need right now?
· How can I support you?
· What is your favorite dinner?
· What is your move date?
· What is your new address? Send a card of encouragement and inspiration.
· What resources do you still need? Places to donate things you aren’t taking, people who can benefit from gently used items and equipment, lists of handymen, garden cleanup, carpet cleaning, etc. – These resources are like gold when you can give reliable, trusted resources.
Ask What They Need
Asking what someone needs helps them clarify exactly what they do need and gives you some choices of what you might offer. It also gives them permission to receive help – as bootstrapping Americans, we are somewhat terrible in being able to ask for help. Once offered, however, it is gratefully received.
Ask How They Would They Would Feel Supported
Somehow, we feel like we are weak when we need support. The truth is that we all need support at various times and worried that if we ask, we will be imposing on others. The reality that we never consider is that giving others an opportunity to help is a gift in itself. It makes the world go around in a more loving way.
What’s Your Favorite Dinner?
Making or picking up dinner with a quick drop-off is always a great gift. If you want to make it special, include some wine or beer and some flowers.
Ask What is Hard Right Now
The answers to this question might give you some clues for what you might be able to do.
My son’s father in law noticed that I had boxes that I couldn’t lift that had to go back to storage. He called one night and told me that he knew I needed help and offered his lifting and logistical skills to help me clear it out.
I was so grateful – I never would have thought of asking him, but we got the job done in record time and had some laughs along the way.
Ask When the Move Date Is
There are many responses to this. The easiest is to make a call the night before and ask some of the questions above. You can also just tell them you are thinking about them and will circle back once they are moved.
Get Their New Address
Send a series of cards encouraging and inspiring them to let them know others care about them.
What Resources Do You Need?
As you start to clear the decks, you will need resources for a multitude of things you never thought you would need. Helping others with your own good list is a huge help.
What I have learned through this move is that encouragement comes in packages of all sizes.
The size doesn’t really matter, it is the caring and the love shared that has kept me going.
I have made a note to ask the important questions whenever I hear of someone who is in a big transition so that it can make their experience just a bit better and help them stay connected.
I cannot count the times in the last year that someone has told me they are moving. It’s pretty common at certain life stages. Everyone hates too much change at once.
The truth is that I lived in the same house for a long time, snug as a bug.
I had forgotten the amount of disruption that occurs with all the minute details of living that once commonplace- not to mention the stress.
Moving is, according to the Google oracle, one of the top five most intense stressors in our lives. It’s right up there with death, divorce, marriage, etc.
One of the things that has helped me make it through without completely losing my mind is all the big and little acts of kindness, generosity and encouragement from friends, family and strangers.
I am embarrassed to say that in the past, I have taken the act of others moving for granted.
I never got around to making a call to see how someone was doing during the move time, never offered to help – or if I did – said something like: “Let me know if I can do anything.”
That is a statement that is so completely general that it means almost nothing. Nice offer but better when it is more concrete.
Better questions are more specific and give you clues as to how you can best offer
· What do you need right now?
· How can I support you?
· What is your favorite dinner?
· What is your move date?
· What is your new address? Send a card of encouragement and inspiration.
· What resources do you still need? Places to donate things you aren’t taking, people who can benefit from gently used items and equipment, lists of handymen, garden cleanup, carpet cleaning, etc. – These resources are like gold when you can give reliable, trusted resources.
Ask What They Need
Asking what someone needs helps them clarify exactly what they do need and gives you some choices of what you might offer. It also gives them permission to receive help – as bootstrapping Americans, we are somewhat terrible in being able to ask for help. Once offered, however, it is gratefully received.
Ask How They Would They Would Feel Supported
Somehow, we feel like we are weak when we need support. The truth is that we all need support at various times and worried that if we ask, we will be imposing on others. The reality that we never consider is that giving others an opportunity to help is a gift in itself. It makes the world go around in a more loving way.
What’s Your Favorite Dinner?
Making or picking up dinner with a quick drop-off is always a great gift. If you want to make it special, include some wine or beer and some flowers.
Ask What is Hard Right Now
The answers to this question might give you some clues for what you might be able to do.
My son’s father in law noticed that I had boxes that I couldn’t lift that had to go back to storage. He called one night and told me that he knew I needed help and offered his lifting and logistical skills to help me clear it out.
I was so grateful – I never would have thought of asking him, but we got the job done in record time and had some laughs along the way.
Ask When the Move Date Is
There are many responses to this. The easiest is to make a call the night before and ask some of the questions above. You can also just tell them you are thinking about them and will circle back once they are moved.
Get Their New Address
Send a series of cards encouraging and inspiring them to let them know others care about them.
What Resources Do You Need?
As you start to clear the decks, you will need resources for a multitude of things you never thought you would need. Helping others with your own good list is a huge help.
What I have learned through this move is that encouragement comes in packages of all sizes.
The size doesn’t really matter, it is the caring and the love shared that has kept me going.
I have made a note to ask the important questions whenever I hear of someone who is in a big transition so that it can make their experience just a bit better and help them stay connected.
I cannot count the times in the last year that someone has told me they are moving. It’s pretty common at certain life stages. Everyone hates too much change at once.
The truth is that I lived in the same house for a long time, snug as a bug.
I had forgotten the amount of disruption that occurs with all the minute details of living that once commonplace- not to mention the stress.
Moving is, according to the Google oracle, one of the top five most intense stressors in our lives. It’s right up there with death, divorce, marriage, etc.
One of the things that has helped me make it through without completely losing my mind is all the big and little acts of kindness, generosity and encouragement from friends, family and strangers.
I am embarrassed to say that in the past, I have taken the act of others moving for granted.
I never got around to making a call to see how someone was doing during the move time, never offered to help – or if I did – said something like: “Let me know if I can do anything.”
That is a statement that is so completely general that it means almost nothing. Nice offer but better when it is more concrete.
Better questions are more specific and give you clues as to how you can best offer
· What do you need right now?
· How can I support you?
· What is your favorite dinner?
· What is your move date?
· What is your new address? Send a card of encouragement and inspiration.
· What resources do you still need? Places to donate things you aren’t taking, people who can benefit from gently used items and equipment, lists of handymen, garden cleanup, carpet cleaning, etc. – These resources are like gold when you can give reliable, trusted resources.
Ask What They Need
Asking what someone needs helps them clarify exactly what they do need and gives you some choices of what you might offer. It also gives them permission to receive help – as bootstrapping Americans, we are somewhat terrible in being able to ask for help. Once offered, however, it is gratefully received.
Ask How They Would They Would Feel Supported
Somehow, we feel like we are weak when we need support. The truth is that we all need support at various times and worried that if we ask, we will be imposing on others. The reality that we never consider is that giving others an opportunity to help is a gift in itself. It makes the world go around in a more loving way.
What’s Your Favorite Dinner?
Making or picking up dinner with a quick drop-off is always a great gift. If you want to make it special, include some wine or beer and some flowers.
Ask What is Hard Right Now
The answers to this question might give you some clues for what you might be able to do.
My son’s father in law noticed that I had boxes that I couldn’t lift that had to go back to storage. He called one night and told me that he knew I needed help and offered his lifting and logistical skills to help me clear it out.
I was so grateful – I never would have thought of asking him, but we got the job done in record time and had some laughs along the way.
Ask When the Move Date Is
There are many responses to this. The easiest is to make a call the night before and ask some of the questions above. You can also just tell them you are thinking about them and will circle back once they are moved.
Get Their New Address
Send a series of cards encouraging and inspiring them to let them know others care about them.
What Resources Do You Need?
As you start to clear the decks, you will need resources for a multitude of things you never thought you would need. Helping others with your own good list is a huge help.
What I have learned through this move is that encouragement comes in packages of all sizes.
The size doesn’t really matter, it is the caring and the love shared that has kept me going.
I have made a note to ask the important questions whenever I hear of someone who is in a big transition so that it can make their experience just a bit better and help them stay connected.
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